


'Cause I'm All Alone

by GottaBe21Rabbits



Series: Stronger Verse [1]
Category: Naruto, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bakugou Katsuki Swears A Lot, Cruelty, Gen, Genderfluid Izuku, Hurt Deku, I'm really trying, Inner Self, Ninja, Rebirth, Small bits of Naruto is included and mentioned, angry kacchan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-27
Updated: 2017-09-27
Packaged: 2019-01-06 02:48:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12202353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GottaBe21Rabbits/pseuds/GottaBe21Rabbits
Summary: Both of them were deemed useless. But they are mightier, stronger---than the world, fate and destiny gave them credit for. Haruno Sakura has risen and shown the universe her strength. It is time for Midoriya Izuku to do the same.





	'Cause I'm All Alone

**Author's Note:**

> This is a first fic so please bear with me. And the idea hit all of a sudden.  
> Disclaimer: Don't own BNHA or Naruto

There is a dream and shout in their head.

Midoriya Izuku remembers a little girl with pink hair and clear green eyes. They dream of being the little girl with pink hair and clear green eyes. She's pretty and she's a girl but Izuku is _a boy_ and he's plain.

The dream starts when their Quirk doesn't manifest. Izuku is confused and wary but the dreams keep coming back. More and more like memories they never had. Izuku gets used to it and adjusts. They never share this to Kaa-san who has been fluttering around and worrying nor even to Kacchan who has become distant since Izuku was diagnosed Quirkless.

(For a four year old child it is weird but it is also a pivotal point in a child's development. Already, ripples have been made.)

The first dream to come consists of punching a rock and seeing it crack then healing the friend covered in blood and _dyingdyingdyingNarutononono_ \---and she saves that friend and survives. It is a bloody dream, scary and not fit for a child's eyes. But Izuku---or is it Sakura?---only feels determination and desperation and love---it is more of a nightmare than a dream but---

  
Izuku with all his might clings to these dreams ( _when he should have rejected them_ ) and accepts them as reality. They find a similarity to the girl especially once Kacchan starts to call them Deku. Useless. Weak. Unimportant. Quirkless. Izuku finds comfort in the girl who faced the same situation with different words and hid her spirit of fire. Sakura. Sakura who is strong.

Sakura, whos showed everyone what she can do.

And Izuku.

Izuku wants to be _strong_ and _help_.

 

\------

 

Midoriya Izuku grows, in one world, alone and friendless. Seeking approval and acknowledgement that maybe his dream to be a Hero wasn't hopeless.

  
Wasn't so out of reach.

He finds it almost 12 years later in man that has been consumed by hopelessness and found light in a student and heir.

They heal each other and Midoriya Izuku finds his place in the world.

In this world...

In this world Midoriya Izuku doesn't find a place for themself. They _carvemake_ a place for themself in the cruel world that says "Those without Quirks are not fit to be heroes." _Because he rememebers a life once theirs._

(There is Haruno Sakura who faced the same prejudice. Who had the world say to her "Those without Clan or talent are nothing. A love struck fool is nothing. You cannot be a Ninja." And they both admired people who had their own world and they struggled to catch up. But this time they will not wait. They're both smart, they can make a way.)

But unlike Izuku Sakura is not alone. She had friends. They had friends, people who supported them no matter what. And Izuku remembers and they value it.

That is enough.

Izuku will not wait to be given a chance.

Midoriya "Deku" Izuku _creates_ their chance.

 

\------

 

Izuku wakes up from their dream full of amazing blue lights and warm hands. Chakra they remember. Maybe I can access it.

They get up from their bed.

The day is still young---the sun hasn't even risen yet. This is his 21st dream and it finally shows how to access chakra and it all seems daunting in pre-dawn light. But Izuku feels energized and optimistic so they smile. _Shannaro! Let's get to work!_ A voice suddenly shouts. Izuku blinks and blinks and then gives the largest smile he can to an empty room full of dreams.

"Shannaro." Izuku murmurs.

_Louder!_

"Shannaro!" They say say.

_LOUDER._

"SHANNARO!"

_LOUDER PIPSQUEAK WE CAN DO THIS!_

Izuku takes a deep breath. " _SHANNAROOOO_ \----"

There is a knock on the door. "Izukkun? Honey are you alright?" Kaa-san's sleepy and worried voice silences the voice in their head. "Izukkun, you were screaming. Is everything alright?" The green-haired boy rubs the back of their head as they flush. They were so loud. The neighbors could've been woken up. So embarrasing. They say in tandem with the voice. They pinch their lips together.

"Izukkun?"

"I'm alright kaa-san."

Their mother says "Okay." And leaves in silent footsteps. Izuku heaves a sigh of relief. They giggle to themself and then sits on the floor. They are Sakura with Sakura's memories and access to Sakura's memories. They can do this. Izuku can be a Hero just like Sakura became a Ninja. So. Chakra. Izuku sits up and takes a deep steadying breath. They remember the lessons of how meditation helps. They make you focus internally and externally. They help you remember things clearer and help your temper---suddenly Kacchan comes to mind. Izuku giggles. No. They stop themself. _Focus_. Izuku draws up the experience of Sakura as they take another breath.

 _Shannaro_.

 

.

 

Izuku spends the morning like that. Meditating for what seems like _forever_ and with nothing to show for it. They sigh as they sot on their school chair. Izuku would try meditating here but gradeschool is loud and messy and full of children that were either of the two aforementioned adjectives. They sit amd wait amd fiddle with their new notebook. Izuku pauses. They have nothing better to do and no one is paying attention. With a small smile forming on their lips they open the new notebook and draw.

The drawings are childish scrawls but they are recognizable enough. Hands. Izuku tries drawing the hand seals etched in Sakura's memories. There are 12 basic seals, five elemental seals, a seal of confrontation and reconciliation---

That is as far as Izuku goes as he hears the _boomspark_ sound that has been characteristic of Kacchan since they were four. They smile. Kacchan might be getting distant---andviolentandcruel, _shush_ \---but the younger boy still admires him. Admires the friend that he wants to be heroes with, the real and only friend Izuku still has. (Because there is no Naruto or Sasuke or Sai or Kakashi or Yamato or Ino---there is no one here from her memories.) "Goodmorning Kacchan." Izuku greets.

Kacchan gives them a cursory glance. "Whatever Deku."

That was a good enough greeting for Izuku. Kacchan must be in a good mood.

_Cha! You call this a good mood!?_

Izuku ignores the voice.

Kacchan is her---his---their friend.

Kacchan will always be---

 

.

 

The day goes like this.

Izuku's classmates are loud and clamoring for attention. Either from Kacchan or Mizuki-sensei and that leaves them mostly alone.

They smile and continue with their work.

They ignore the pitying glances the whispers of Deku and Quirkless. They ignore the tears prickling in their eyes and the fists clenching beneath the desks. Instead Izuku clings to the images of Ino-chan telling her (SakuraSakuraSakura) that she can do it. That she can fight back. Images of Naruto and Sasuke relying on her and Kakashi-sensei praising her.

At 7 years old, 3 years since the first dream of Ninjas and Sakura, this is everything Izuku needs to survive the taunts.

"It's Deku."

_"Goodmorning Sakura-chan!"_

"Didja know? Momma said being Quirkless is contagious."

_"You're amazing Sakura-chan!"_

"He's pathetic. Look, look always with Katsuki when he isn't wanted."

_"Let's be friends, Sakura-chan!"_

"He's weak!"

"Ouch! Sakura-chan that hurt! You're too strong!"

_"Sakura---"_

"---OI. Deku, are you deaf or something!?" Izuku snaps out of his daze and looks at Kacchan. Behind him are their other "friends" sneering and making faces at Izuku. The young child ignores it and focuses all attention on their friend. "Stop being stupid, Deku. D'ya wanna go or not!? The hell are you staring for!?"

"Ah!" Izuku smiles widely. "Of course, Kacchan!"

Their friend scoffs and walks away. Izuku can't help the rise of happiness in that flowed.

They continue their last school activity with the teacher ignoring as their classmates mock them and tease them. Izuku wishes Iruka-sensei was here.

 _I wish there's an Iruka-sensei here, these teachers are_ scum. The voices says. Izuku finds themself silently agreeing. Even a Kakashi-sensei who prefers puppies over kids is much better and that's saying something. Kakashi-sensei was an eternally socially-awkward troll. He may prefer the more brutal and hands-on method but at least he had been there for her and supported her--him---their in his own Kakashi-sensei way.

At last when they are let out Izuku gladly gathers his things and follows Kacchan. Kaa-san has let Izuku do what Izuku wanted as long as it is safe and they come home before dark.

The five of them marches on with Kacchan leading their entourage and holding off imaginary Villains. It is a happy afternoon because no one pays attention to Izuku, meaning no one teases and mocks, and they are all laughing and playing. The sun is shining and happy with them it seems to Izuku. The trees are smaller than those in the Hashirama Forest or Ground 44 but they are still big to Izuku's small stature. They are not impossible to climb and so they do. There are creaks not hazardous to cross and so they do. Going in a forest may be unsafe but Izuku trusts Kacchan.

(Although the memories of Sakura disaggree. They say that anything can go wrong. And for some reason he feels like something will.)

Izuku is happy and smiling and laughing and for once since he was four years old not one memory of Sakura really compares because this event is his.

 

.

 

The day ends like this.

Kacchan falls off a small cliff and Izuku is frantic with worry. **_Memories and memories_** of falling bloody comrades assault his mind in where he can't do anything despite having chakra as Sakura and being able to wield it. He immediately slides down leaving the other kids who just stared stunned and shouting franticly but still doing nothing. Izuku is Sakura and he remembers a time where he can't do anything no matter how strong. Remembers a promise to get stronger and better, to help friends and comrades and to no longer be left behind.

**_To no longer leave anyone behind._ **

Izuku is Sakura and so he shouts "Kacchan! Are you alright?" His hand outstretching to the soaked older boy and his mind going in tangents of what Kacchan might need while ignoring that he was getting scrapes and leaves and dirt stuck on him. Blankets and hot drink and may gauzes or band-aids---is that blood!?---and he smiles at his friend, waiting for the hand to grasp his. "C'mon, I'll help you up Kacchan."

Kacchan's hand moves.

And they slap his away.

Izuku's mind goes blank as Kacchan snarls. "I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP, STUPID DEKU!" He's numb as Kacchan for the first time uses his Quirk to force him away. Once more memories assault him as Kacchan leaves him behind. Visions of Sasuke and Naruto leaving, of being foolish enough to break his friendship with Ino-chan and having her leave him behind. It is not pleasant and Izuku moves when he can't hear Kacchan anymore, when the sky is almost dark like an enroaching Amaterasu ready to pummel him to death.

He goes home like this:

  
Numb of the tears cascading down his face. Wet and cold and full of bruises and scrapes. Dirty and shivering and still full of memories, missing a shoe and ready to sleep away the exhaustion and sadness in his veins. The voice in his head is silent like it is mourning for something lost.

_What did I do wrong?_

His Kaa-san hugs him with all her might.

Sakura is weak but she is also _strong._

But Izuku seems to only be weakweakweak.

 

.

 

Another day approaches and when Izuku goes to school Kacchan is already there and everyone is ignoring him.

Izuku is left alone for almost five years and no matter what he reasons the voice in his head disagrees that a conversation does not consist of strikes and burns and disparaging words.

Izuku wishes things were different.

_**In the end he will.** _

**Author's Note:**

> So. Yeah. That's the first part. The trial run so to speak. I'm hoing to continue cause I have the ideas but I'm welcome to suggestions that i think are great. Please give constructive criticisms if u can. I know this has a lot of grammar mistakes. So. Hahahah yeah. Anyway the title is from Shrek when Donkey first met Shrek anf tried singing. And Izuku is genderfluid in this cause he has years of memories as Sakura but as 4 and 7 year old Izuku he has enough of a personality and the memories come in bits and pieces starting from Sakura's earliest memory. I'm no child psychologist tho so I'm no authority.
> 
>  
> 
> On a different note how do you access the italics and shmitt on this when you use a moblie???


End file.
